It is October 2020, and I’m assigned photography for the article Cardinal & Cream is publishing on residence life during this current pandemic. One of those photos is of Mary Milton. As I interact with her for the first time, I see her kind and welcoming spirit. Little did I know, she would be assigned to check in on me when I was quarantined just a few weeks later.
Another month passes by and I walk past her desk on my way to class. She calls out my name and tells me to come there. She encourages me and says that the photo published in the magazine was her favorite photo she has ever seen of herself. And she finally connected the dots that I was the one she called those two weeks in quarantine.
From that day on, Mary Milton has remembered me and recognized my face every single time I walk past her desk.
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Mary Milton, the residence life director, has a multifaceted job with a list of responsibilities that could never fit on this page. Many know her from her desk that sits in the corner of the Bowld, allowing students to walk past and interact with her on a daily basis. She does the same jobs every day, but at the same time, every day looks different.
Her job ranges from answering the phone, handling housing assignments, overseeing graduate and Warmath housing, managing residence life guest suites, making reservations for the Bowld Student Commons, planning family weekend and the marriage conference and so much more. If this exhaustive list tells you anything about Mary Milton, it is that ResLife would fall apart without her love for the students.
Even as I sit with her on the couch by her desk, her job doesn’t stop. She answers her phone several times and speaks to students who walk up with questions. Her job never stops, but that’s what she adores.
Milton’s job is unique because she isn’t in a place of authority like a professor or faculty member. She is a helper. A place for students to freely talk about life.
“I am more of a support system than a faculty member would be,” said Milton. “And I get to share in students’ milestones.”
Because of the location of her desk, Milton gets to work closely with the RAs as they work the desk in the Bowld. The desk has an interesting history as it used to be behind the RA desk, but this was problematic because, as you can imagine, RAs have their friends come by. There can be up to six people behind there at once. After it was moved to the corner, she could be more productive, while still being involved in the students’ lives.
“It’s great because I’m tucked away where I can get my work done, but I can see people and they can see me and there’s nothing impeding students from coming up and asking questions,” said Milton as she showed me her desk. “I can say hello to people and sometimes I’ve met people who want to introduce themselves. I love that I am right here, and not tucked away in an office somewhere. It’s a great location.”
The relationship with the RAs is what Milton loves the most about her job. She enjoys helping people by speaking to them on the phone, or including a smiley face at the end of an email, but the ongoing relationships with RAs and RDs is what makes this job so special.
“The RAs are stellar, and they are a treat to know,” Milton said. “They are so fun and when they decide to graduate or not be an RA anymore, it is such a sad day. The RDs are very thoughtful and caring and tireless. In the past our RD meetings have been really funny, but in the past year, they’ve been a little more serious just because we’ve faced very serious problems.”
Mary Milton supports both the RAs and the RDS, and they support her in return. It is a two-way relationship that is unique to her specific role in the students’ lives. She is like a mother to all her fellow RAs and RDs.
Milton told many stories of her interactions with both students and RAs, but one of the most interesting was when several guys showed her their engagement rings right before they planned to propose.
“There’s been multiple occasions where a young man will pull an engagement ring out of his backpack and show me the ring because I’m here, and I’m interested, and they’ve just gotten it at the post office,” said Milton. “And I get to be one of the first people to see it, and it is so special.”
Showing someone an engagement ring requires established trust. After all, this is one of the biggest moments in their lives. Because of these interactions, Milton has attended multiple students’ weddings and has an ongoing relationship with them.
Because of the impact COVID-19 has had on ResLife, Milton also took on the role of overseeing who cleans quarantine and isolation dorms as well as calling and checking in on students while they are quarantined. This is a unique way to connect with students because she gets to ask questions and talk to them in a lonely time of their lives.
“I get to talk to them on the phone for a few weeks, and then I see them in the dining hall and am able to say, ‘Aren’t you so and so? I’m Mrs. Mary who’s been talking to you!’” Milton said as she speaks about her love for this aspect of her job.
No matter if Mary Milton is calling incoming freshmen or looking at someone’s engagement ring, she is present with them in that moment. She is always there to be a listening ear.
“I’ve heard so many people call Mrs. Milton a saint and she is,” said Lauren Reed, a junior social work major and student worker for Mary Milton. “She is very organized, communicative and so easy to talk to. She made me feel so comfortable around her from the first time I met her.”
