David and Emily Bowman moved three times in five months.
They were married in April, Emily graduated from Union in May and David began the position of assistant residence director (ARD) for Heritage Residence Complex in July. For this Union couple, it has been a busy half-year, to say the least. That chaotic circling from regular dorms, to Ted Kluck’s Airbnb, to Hope and finally to McAfee Commons was filled with exactly the kind of stress you would expect. However, it also gave opportunities for the weighty challenges and personal learning found in the Bowmans’ call to ministry.
“It’s nice to have a home with your spouse, instead of feeling like you’re living out of suitcases with your spouse. That wasn’t horrible by any means, but it definitely added to some stress,” Emily Bowman said. “It was a lot. Yes, I was mostly done with college but there were still classes, and then I had a job and then we got married and then we moved and then we moved again.”
Having graduated in 2020, David Bowman underwent this Odyssean wandering for an extra year. He orbited Union, interning at Fellowship Bible Church and working part-time as a barista, all with his precious possessions packed in his car.
“One of the guys in my small group mentioned yesterday: he was like ‘yeah it was a little bit stressful for about a month when you’d open the car door, and we couldn’t really take David’s car because there were boxes in there,'” David said. “The good news is my car is finally clean. I can fit everyone in there at full capacity. We’re good.”
The couple’s final move to their McAfee apartment was thus a space for breathing room. David started his ARD training the day after they moved, but even at that quick pace, the new home oriented the couple from previous moving stress to their new challenge. Books are now on the shelves; pictures are on the walls; their shared camera collection is proudly displayed; and their cat, Clementine, is pouncing from the couches.
“I don’t think we really settled down until we were here in McAfee, in this apartment, because this finally felt like home. It felt like an apartment, not like a dorm,” David said. “Having that living situation, it’s just so peaceful. It’s like—I can go home. It’s nice to walk in the door and be like ‘this is our stuff; we have pictures on the walls.'”
The triple cycle of stress has not been endured for naught. The past six months have indeed been full of challenges for the Bowmans, but that is exactly why they like it: not because it is comfortable, but because it is ministry.
“As I became an RA, I figured out more about my passions and my passion for ministry: walking alongside students and young adults as they try to figure out what they want to do with their lives,” David said. “In those times as an RA, I really did fall in love with it. I fell in love with residence life and walking alongside people in relationships and life. That’s what it is. You live with the people around you. That’s the definition of ministry right there: being in life with someone.”
Residence life—not just the university department but rather the goal of Christ-centered community—is the challenge at which the Bowmans have set their sight.
“We’re both passionate about meeting people where they are, and so having a home on campus makes it easy to welcome people into your life. You just open a door and bake some cookies and people smell that and come running. Wherever God takes us, we want to foster that sort of environment,” Emily said.
“It’s a challenge sometimes. It’s not easy. You’re not always gonna want to get up and be like ‘okay come into our house! Let us care for you!’ It’s hard. But ultimately, I think we both have been really impacted by people who have done that to us in our life, and we both believe that’s how we can love as Jesus loved—to build a safe environment where people can break, or laugh or be what they need to be,” she continued.
Moving is not comfortable. New jobs are not comfortable. Living in a dorm as a married couple—even in Union’s fifth-ranked dorms—is not comfortable. Riding in the back of David Bowman’s car when it is stuffed full of boxes definitely is not comfortable. But comfort is not the Bowmans’ goal. That’s the lesson that a friend taught David.
“I was talking to a friend recently. He just moved to Nashville. He was talking about how that was a leap of faith that he had to take. Not being familiar with the area, there’s going to be a lot of struggles there. It’s going to be uncomfortable, and yet he knew that that’s where he was supposed to be. It challenged me to really be okay with that uncomfortableness. I think it’s hard to break out of that comfort zone, but I want to be challenged by that, and embrace that, and be okay with it,” David said.
In McAfee Common’s octagonal home in the circle of life, the Bowmans practice their new ministry. From fulfilling official reslife duties to walking their RAs through struggles over an evening cup of coffee, David and Emily Bowman have found a calling that lies above comfort.
“It’s been good. It’s been really good. It’s been a learning process but in a good way,” Emily said.
